+100

Today is a HUGE milestone for transplant survivors.  In a way, today my transplant survivor status is official.  It's Day +100!!!!!

I can drive.  I can prepare food.  I can change diapers.  I can be in my home without adult supervision of any kind.

My post transplant scans all came back clear which was pretty anti-climactic.  We knew they would be.  I just can't get myself to feel much of anything about it because right now I can't get past the fact that my remission can be taken from me at any time.  I'm trying to focus on the positive and there is SO much of that in my life.

I'm learning that when it is most important for you to be optimistic, it's also the hardest to be optimistic.  So, in honor of reaching the +100 milestone with Bone Marrow that functions pretty darn well and without being re-hospitalized one single time, I present you with a list of positive thoughts:

• There is no reasonable explanation for why I made it 100 days without having a single fever.  I had to go to the hospital 4 times during my first line treatment to have blood cultures done because I had a fever.  I went into labor with Avery because of a fever.  Somehow, this time when my immune system was WAY WAY WAY more compromised to the extent that I as not allowed to handle dirty laundry...not one single extra trip to the hospital.  In a house with 6 small children where the baby plays in the toilet, the garbage, and plays "Ice Bucket Challenge" with the dog's water bowl.  In a house with a potty training 3 year old boy.  That's crazy, and that's pretty awesome.

• My husband is such a hard worker and such a super smart man that he was able to provide not only the medical care that I required but also Nannies 4 days a week so that I would be able to follow all my post transplant restrictions in a house with 6 kids who are home all day.  

• I live in a town and a time where I have access to world class healthcare a short 20 minute drive from my home.

• We are surrounded by friends and family who have supported us from the very beginning of this ordeal.

• I get to go back to Pilates tonight and get back to swimming my laps this week.

• My hair is really coming in and my eyebrows have come in so well that I have to pluck the ones that step out of line.  100 days ago I was completely cueball bald and had about 9 eyebrow hairs total and no eyelashes at all.

• Regardless of the what the future may hold, I have this time with my family, right now.

There's a thing among transplant survivors where you post a picture of yourself on Day +100 so here it is, from my grainy cellphone camera, taken by my son Owen:

Hair: check.  Eyebrows: check  Eyelashes: check  Functioning Bone Marrow: check

Thank you everyone for your prayers, love, and support as I continue to walk this crazy cancer road!  Day +100 is not what I thought it might be, but it's still pretty darn good.